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THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING MAN

Ephesians 5:23-28

Do you remember years ago watching the movie The Incredible Shrinking Man? In the movie the main character is a man who because of an exposure to a chemical slowly gets smaller and smaller until there is really nothing left of him.

Today in American Homes, American Society, and in the Lord's Churches the exact same thing is happening. Because of a prolonged exposure to a misguided culture.. manhood, true manhood  is slowly getting smaller and smaller until there is now very little left of them.

Far too many men have become detached, distant and passive in the 2 most important areas of their life -- Home and Church. They no longer take lead; or show the imitative, they avoid responsibility.
They run away from commitment and resist obligation; and they renege on the promises that they made to their wives, children, Church and Lord.

I. THE EFFECTS

And this lack of manhood -- THIS shrinking away of true men has hurt our families and our churches...
25 million children (36.3%) do not live with their fathers.
40% of children in fatherless homes have not seen their father's in a least 1 year.
50% of children who live without their fathers have never stepped foot in their father's home.
63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes.
85% of children that exhibit behavior disorders are from fatherless homes
80% of rapists are from fatherless homes
71% of high school drop outs are from fatherless homes.
75% of all adolescent patients in chemical abuse centers are from fatherless homes
70% of juveniles in state operated institutions come from fatherless homes
85% of youths in prison are from fatherless homes
70% of teen pregnancies are from fatherless homes
72% of Americans polled recently said the physical absence of fathers is the most serious problem facing America's families.

The damage done in the church has been no less staggering. Many times churches have become stagnant or have decayed, as men cower in the background afraid to act; afraid to lead; afraid to accept responsibility; afraid to do the right thing.  Many times in many places this lack of male leadership has created a void that has been filled by the ladies of the church... who many times do more work, are more committed, will see things through to the end and know more about the Word of God.

Many times when a job needs to be done in the church men will say, "I don't want to be in charge but I'll help -- In other words I don't want to be a leader, I don't want responsibility, I want a way out..."  There is a serious problem in our society -- men are missing from action -- They are shrinking away from their God given responsibility at home and in the church.

AND, not only are Men missing, THEY are also hurting. Despite the feminist rhetoric that would have us believe that females have suffered far more than men. The statistics show that modern society has taken a toll on modern man and He is in turmoil.
88% of drunk drivers are men.
83% of people arrested for serious crimes are men.
85% of all murders are committed by men.
75% of all suicides are men.
A man is 25 times more likely to end up in state prison. Men are more likely to have ulcers, and to die from cancer, pneumonia, liver disease, strokes, hardening of the arteries and heart failure.

I have said all that to underscore the fact that there are serious problems out there.... And I think you would have to agree with me that their are.
Do you remember what Harry Truman said, "The Buck stops here..."  Why did you think he said that? Because he was the guy in charge, he was the leader -- an with leadership comes responsibility... And Harry Truman understood and accepted that.

God has ordained man rule in the home and man rule in his church... Men are the ones in charge.. They are the leaders and with leadership comes responsibility.  And far too many men have abandoned these posts of leadership -- in the home, and in the church. They have left their posts and the damage has been great.

II. THE PATTERN

I am convinced that the only way to even begin to repair the damage is for men to be real men... But just what does that mean? And where do you go to find an example of what a real man is?  There is much confusing in our society, due largely to the influence of humanism, feminism and the overall lack of attention to the biblical teaching of manhood. All of which has led to some confusing role models.

ROLE MODELS LIKE: Rambo and Steven Segall: men who are real men because they can kill without hesitation. They can destroy and break things, men who show no sorrow or guilt at their deeds...  Or men like Magic Johnson or the ones on the day and nighttime soaps who are declaring that a real man is determined by the number of women that he has been with.

And then there are role models like Al Bundy or Dan Arnold. Men who are not in control of their homes, and are at times simply bumbling idiots. Whose families mock, ridicule and have no respect for them.

So where do we turn to find out what a real man is?   When you get a TV you get a book; when you get a car you get a book -- when you get a dishwasher you get a book; and when you get a life you get a book.... and it stands to reason because the designer knows how his equipment will operate best.  The point should be clear. When we ask "What is a man?" We're not going to ask CNN, CBS, NBC OR ABC.   We are going to ask the Creator what He had in mind when He created man... We are going to ask God to reveal His purposes for a man.

I believe there are four pillars in the Scriptures that describe God's plan for men.

1. KING

The King pillar is clearly central to Scriptures theme for men. God is the King of kings. His Son is the Second Adam, He has been given "all power and authority in heaven and on earth." And Adam, the prototype man was instructed to have "dominion" and is to be the head/the Ruler in the home and in the church.

The King pillar teaches us that man is to be the provider. He is to provide for all his family's needs and understand men that to provide for our families means much more than paying the rent, buying food, buying clothes or paying for college tuition.  men we are to provide for more than the physical needs of their family, they are to provide for their emotional and spiritual needs as well.

Men are to be kings. And the king looks ahead -- he scouts the new territory to ensure his families needs are met -- the king doesn't wait for them to ask, he diligently searches to understand all of his families needs.. And the king watches over, he provides order, he provides mercy and justice and the king is the authority.

2. WARRIOR

The warrior pillar is equally unmistakable in Scripture. Our God is a warrior of both testaments. Gentle Jesus, meek and mild? He closes the Book on a white war horse, in a blood spattered rob, with a sword in His mouth and a rod of iron in His hand. The book ends with a roar, not a whimper. Within the epistles, the mature believing man is often described in military terms, "endure hardship with us like a good soldier" (2 Tim 2:3) "Guard what has been entrusted to your care..." (1 Tim 6:20) - a warrior equipped to battle mighty enemies and shatter satanic strongholds.

The HEART of a WARRIOR is a PROTECTIVE heart. The warrior shields, defends, stands between and guards. A warrior is a protector. Men stand tallest when they are PROTECTING and DEFENDING.

Every father of a little boy knows that warrior tendencies are a part of the package. They arrive when the boy did. It doesn't matter if you never give your little guy a toy gun, he'll use his finger.  Are you appalled at the idea of as toy hand grenade? Creative little warriors get by fine with exploding dirt clods, nuclear pine cones or high -concussion snowballs. Men are designed to be warriors - to protect.

There are many things which seek to bring harm to our families and to our churches. Men  are to be the warriors -- they are to protect and defend their families and their churches. They must not let someone hurt them.  Men must be willing to sacrifice their time and comfort. And they must be willing to risk and danger necessary in order to protect their family and church.

3. MENTOR

The mentor pillar is not only modeled through the pages of the bible, it is explicitly commanded in the form of "teaching them to observe whatsoever I have commanded" and "fathers do not exasperate your children, instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."

The heart of a mentor is a teaching heart. The mentor knows. He wants others to know. He models, explains and trains. He disciples his wife - his kids then others. A man is supposed to know things. Like how a car runs. Or the inner workings of a vacuum cleaner. Or how many legs are on a spider. Or how many miles to the next rest stop.

It's up to him to know why electricity flows, dogs bark, birds migrate, hamsters die, trees lose their leaves, dads loss their hair and girls down the street act weird. Why do family members ask the man of the house these things? Because men are supposed to know how things work. And what to do next. And where to go from wherever you are,. Men are supposed to be able to teach life.

4. FRIEND

The heart of a friend is a loving heart; a compassionate heart, a tender heart. Underneath the warriors breastplate beats a tender center. In every man there is a tender side. The side that connects to another. That has the thirst for relationship. The desire to touch and be touched. To hug and to be hugged.

General Norman Schwarzkoph not long after the Gulf war appeared in an interview with Barbara Walters. in the course of their conversation about the war, something touched the big man. And the country watched with fascination as the eyes of the career soldier with 4 stars on his shoulder glazed over and tears formed in his eyes.

Barbara Walters with well practiced bluntness said, "Why General aren't you afraid to cry?" Storming Norman replied without hesitation, "No Barbara I'm afraid of a man who won't cry." Barbara had more than she bargained for and on the other side of the microphone America was witnessing the distinctive heart beat of a tender warrior.

Listen to the words of the Apostle Paul in I Thess. 2:7-8; "But we were gentle among you, even as a nurse cherisheth her children: So being affectionately desirous of you, we were willing to have imparted unto you, not the gospel of God only, but also our own souls, because ye were dear unto us."

III. THE PASSION

Once we understand the problem and accept the pattern (KING -- WARRIOR -- MENTOR -- FRIEND) we need to develop a passion.-- Warriors need to answer the call. Men do you hear the call to action? Do you hear the call that God is sending forth to the men of His churches to be tender warriors.
Will you answer the call? to action in your families.

We have been given by God (regardless of what the feminists say), we've been given the responsibility of leadership in the home. The questions that we just asked should concern us because we are responsible for the health of our home.

1) MEN what your families need, what your wives and children need is YOU! Our society tells men that what their families really need is what their increased salaries can buy them; a better bike, a newer video game, a nicer home, a fancier car, the most stylish clothes, a 3 karat diamond ring, a country club membership, a computer or even their own credit card. MEN your families don't need that stuff. They need you!!

2) Wives need husbands who will obey the command of God in (Eph. 5:25-28).

3) Dads your kids need YOU...They need to know that you care more about them then the football game, your career, your bank account or the guys at the office. You need to spend time with them? Talk with them? Teach them Christian values like: integrity, right and wrong (and discipline them when they do wrong), You need to teach them the value in hard honest work. You need to let them know that you are available at any time to help them with their struggles. They shouldn't have to make an appointment to be with you!

MEN the most 3 important things we can give your children is your time, unconditional love and training and instruction in the Lord.

Too many Men have been missing for to long from the front lines of the battle field . The enemy is gaining ground and our fellow soldiers are tired and need our help. Men it's time that YOU run to the battle!!!

IT'S TIME TO LEAD...
TO SET THE PACE...
TO BE EXAMPLES....
TO DO THE WORK....
TO GIVE OUR BEST....
IT'S TIME BUILD THE HOUSE OF GOD....
(Your home and the church)

Men how about giving your family and your church a gift -- be God's kind of man - be a tender warrior!!